Learning to control yourself in the face of adversity is essential in becoming a complete person. The lesson of self control is one best learned early. Children are naturally impulsive and need to be taught handle these inclinations. Teaching the art of self containment can be challenging but is one of the most profitable life skills you can impart to your children or students. Try to impart self control techniques to children aged 5 years and up.
Instructions
1. Instruct the children to take a literal step backward when they feel themselves losing control. The natural desire is to make a drive forward which can be the beginning of reckless behavior. If you witness the child beginning to lose control you should calmly ask him to take a step back.
2. Ask the child who is on the edge to take three deep breaths. This will give her more oxygen and allow her a moment to think prior to acting. Breathing techniques can be practiced at various times so that the action will be natural when the child needs to call upon it.
3. Teach children the old fashioned method of counting to 10 to regain control. Another idea to divert their minds away from an explosive situation is to tell them to sing a silly song to themselves like "On Top of Spaghetti" or "Pop Goes the Wease." This will help relieve the tension they are feeling.
4. Take a child or multiple children who are engaging in aggressive or "hyperactive" behavior outside to run off some steam. Exercise promotes the release of endorphins which sends the "I'm feeling good" message to the brain. If the situation prevents going outdoors, try some indoor calisthenics.
5. Encourage a volatile child to channel his emotions into writing. Have him pour out all that he is feeling, no matter how negative into a 5 minute free flowing writing exercise. Chances are he will feel much more in control of himself after venting. You do not need to read the document as you know it was written while the child was in a stressful state. Allow him to throw it away when he feels like it rather than keeping it as a reminder of his frustration. Parents and teachers should check out Anita Bohensky's book "Anger Management Workbook for Kids and Teens" which is available from Amazon (see Resources below).
6. Practice scenarios with children in which losing control is featured. Have them act out common place events that often lead to explosions like tussling over a place in line or arguing over a particular toy. When children are taught the correct way of handling these situations they will be more likely to employ self control when faced with a similar event in real life.
7. Push aside a task that is causing a child to lose control. Teach her that it is sometimes necessary to take a break prior to completing a project that is causing her stress to the point of imploding. During her time away from the irksome or difficult task she can practice her breathing techniques or exercise.
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